10 things women can do to attract men, rather than chase them

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Have you ever noticed how some women seem to ooze charm, causing the men around them to fall at their heels? 

These women never have to pursue men because they’re always being pursued! 

It might seem like they’ve got a secret perfume or hidden talent that the rest of us are unaware of, but in reality, it comes down to a few habits that will greatly increase attraction.

So, here are 10 things women can do to attract men, rather than chase them: 

1) Be interesting 

Ladies, if you’re tired of chasing men and want to turn the tables, start by being interesting. 

Easier said than done though, right? 

I remember getting this advice in my 20s and wondering, “How the heck do I do that?”…So here are a few tips:

  • Be yourself, it’s surprising how much more attractive you become when you stop holding back on your personality – quirks and all! 
  • Get clued up – be interested in what’s happening in the world so you have interesting topics to discuss with others. 
  • Learn how to tell a story (for this, you should watch how celebrities speak and time their punch lines, I recommend Morgan Freeman or Tom Hanks).

But ultimately, the more interest you show in others, the more interesting you become! 

And when men see this, they’ll want to know more about you…You won’t just gain their attention, you’ll gain their curiosity too! 

2) Practice self-care 

Self-care will be your best friend when it comes to attracting men naturally. 

When you start to:

  • Eat healthy, drink plenty of water, and sleep well
  • Exercise regularly 
  • Keep a good hygiene regime 
  • Look after your mental health

You’ll glow in a way that no makeup can contend with! And this, my friends, is irresistible to men. 

As well as looking and feeling good within yourself, you’ll exude an inner confidence and respect that will catch the attention of any man! 

3) Display confidence 

Talking of confidence, this is another guaranteed way to attract men. 

And let’s be honest, confident women don’t chase men, they flip the role and make men work for their attention instead! 

But I get it, confidence doesn’t come to all of us naturally, so how can you “fake it til you make it”?

  • Make eye contact when speaking to someone 
  • Stand up/sit up straight and avoid slouching or hunched shoulders 
  • Speak your mind and avoid mumbling or fidgeting 

Personally, I find it helps to take a nice, deep breath before speaking. This allows me to gather my thoughts, steady my voice, and confidently speak. 

Ultimately, men find confidence extremely attractive. 

They want a woman who knows her worth and isn’t afraid to speak up, so if there’s one thing you do today, it’s working on those confidence levels! 

4) Cultivate your passions 

Now, this next point will keep you so busy that you simply won’t have time to chase men, but at the same time, it will make you an interesting, attractive person! 

And the good news about cultivating your passions?

You can go wild here! 

Whether it’s hiking, traveling, trying new food, or learning to play an instrument, when you follow what makes your heart happy, you instantly get an attractive vibe about you.

Let me give you an example:

In a restaurant recently, the waitress talked about how much she loves dancing Flamenco. Granted, I live in Spain so that’s not unusual.

However, the way she spoke about it was totally captivating. Her passion shone through and there wasn’t a guy in the restaurant who could tear his eyes away from her! 

5) Be direct in your communication  

I’m going to level with you, I know how easy it is to get flustered when you’re interested in a guy but you’re trying to hide it. 

That’s why if you want men to chase you and not the other way around, you need to get good at communicating directly. 

Avoid oversharing and telling men your entire life story when all they asked is if you’d like a coffee before the big work meeting. 

Instead, stick to the point.

If you want to say, “Hey”, say just that. If you want to say, “I’m fine thanks”, say it without following up with a whole explanation of why you’re fine. 

Do you see what I mean?

When you’re direct with your words, it makes men more curious about you. Remember – men enjoy the chase, some even believe it’s in their DNA to “hunt”. 

So by giving them nothing more or nothing less, you’re making them work to get to know you! 

6) Smile and make eye contact 

But whilst you’re being direct, you don’t want to be rude or completely uninterested. 

That’s why flashing those pearly whites and maintaining eye contact will help you attract and avoid chasing them! 

As you may have realized, I’ve mentioned eye contact a few times already, and here’s why:

When you lock eyes with a man, it shows your interest and confidence levels, for a start. 

But it also suggests trustworthiness. 

It’s this nonverbal communication that’ll stick in a guy’s mind long after the conversation has finished.

And smiling?

Well, we all look our best when we smile, and it gives off an air of positivity and friendliness. 

This is a signal to men that while you’re not going to chase them, you are up for being chased! 

7) Keep an air of mystery  

Remember how I mentioned not oversharing when communicating?

Well, that’s because men need a mystery to keep them hooked. 

If you tell them your every desire, fear, and life goal before he’s even had the chance to tell you his name, it’s not going to arouse his interest further.

So, how can you be more mysterious?

  • Only give away essential details 
  • Listen more and talk less 
  • Be unpredictable 

Another thing that I personally find useful is to use this line:

“Great question, but that’s a story for another day…”

You see when you use this line on a man, he’ll instantly be curious to hear the story. But you’re making him wait for it, hence the start of his attraction and chase to find out more! 

8) Work on your sense of humor 

A woman I used to work with had a wicked sense of humor. She was quite sarcastic and dry, and men went crazy over it. 

It wasn’t that she busted jokes with every guy in the staff room though. In fact, she mainly hung around with other women.

But I’d see how men on the other side of the room would chuckle when she’d make a joke – I’d see how they’d look at her with respect and admiration. 

So, if you want men to chase you and find you attractive, develop your sense of humor

A good starting point is learning to laugh at yourself. Once you’re able to do that, you’ll never be the butt of a joke again. Instead, you’ll ooze confidence! 

And as we’ve already established, that’s super attractive to men! 

9) Get on with your life 

Now, this next point might sound a bit counterproductive…How will you attract men if you’re busy doing your own thing?

Well, it’s precisely that that’ll make you sought after! Let me explain…

When you have a life of your own and aren’t waiting at home for a man to call, you’re giving off the energy of someone confident and independent. 

Men will pick up on that. 

When they overhear you talking about your upcoming trip, or how you spent the weekend celebrating a friend’s new art gallery, they’ll realize you’re busy living life. 

So, why will this make men attracted to you?

Well, for starters, it shows you’re not desperate or lonely. And when they hear how busy you are, it’s almost a signal for them to try harder to get your attention! 

10) Maintain a positive attitude 

And finally, if you can maintain a positive, carefree, and happy attitude, you’ll never have to resort to chasing men again! 

You see, amongst confidence, sexy and all the other adjectives men look for in women, being positive is a must. 

Men generally aren’t attracted to women who complain every day or who are moody and pessimistic. It’s not attractive regardless of your gender. 

On the other hand…

A woman who approaches life with a bounce in her step and a “can-do” attitude will grab the attention of most men – mainly because as humans, we’re drawn to warm, bubbly energy! 

So, now you’re armed with 10 things you can do to attract men rather than chase them – have fun with it! 

Remember, you’re not going to perfect every point on the list, so just choose the ones that’ll suit you and go from there! 

Hopefully, a great guy will see your personality shine through and the rest will be history! 

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

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Kiran Athar

Kiran is a freelance writer with a degree in multimedia journalism. She enjoys exploring spirituality, psychology, and love in her writing. As she continues blazing ahead on her journey of self-discovery, she hopes to help her readers do the same. She thrives on building a sense of community and bridging the gaps between people. You can reach out to Kiran on Twitter - @KiranAthar1.

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